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Facebook Statuses People Don't Want to See

 

Sometimes we can be too connected to the world. Yes, there is in fact a line in regards to social media that should not be crossed. Yet, time and time again people literally sprint full speed at that cliff to make sure they plunge off it in spectacular fashion.

What can you do?

In the scientific world people use what is called a "filter" to help separate things out. Maybe you have heard of that concept; maybe you should try it. Need help? No problem, being helpful is what we are all about. Here are some great things you should make sure not to update the world with on Facebook along with why. Because if you don't understand why that shit really annoys us you will probably keep posting it.

The Don't Post List

·       Your Bathroom Status - Really? It's bad enough that the smart phone has replaced a magazine or book for the preferred bathroom time waster (no way my iPad is going in there) but do you really need to tell me about it? Tip for all the guys, no girl who you are friends with thinks its sexy to know you just spent the last hour with Montezuma's Revenge.

·       Asking for Advice - So basically not only can you not make up your own mind but you don't have close friends to confide in for advice either. Instead you are going to open up your personal life to your friends list and face a lot of ridicule which you will then respond to in anger. On second thought keep posting these because then we get to mock you.

·       Telling Us How Drunk You Are - Good for you...just a few short steps from being a full-fledged alcoholic! Seriously if you have nothing better to do after getting drunk then post on Facebook that you are drunk then you are just doing it all wrong.

·       Just Woke Up - Awesome. Unless I am stalking you then I don't care. If I am stalking you then obviously I already know this because I was outside your window. Nobody gives a crap when you are going to bed either. How big is your ego that you think anyone really does care?

·       Can't Sleep - Ah the middle of the night cry for attention! Do you see that 'Friends Online' list? Just message someone or start to play a game if you can't sleep. Don't beat around the bush and beg for sympathy. We have all been there.

·       I'm Bored - How nice...do you expect me to entertain you? Like I have nothing better to do?

·       Gym Updates - Good for you...you just ran 5 miles in 35 minutes. Now I feel like a fat bastard for sitting here at my computer and reading about it. Hey if you run a marathon or some other big thing then by all means let's hear about it. But nobody gives two shakes that you are going to the gym.

There are other things which can be pretty annoying but if we listed every damn thing that pissed someone off then we would never use Facebook. Since it is doubtful that will ever happen (does anyone remember MySpace anymore?) we have to make do with learning how to self-filter and not spew so much crap for the world to see.