Get the Man-Info you need Every Week in the Bro Guide!

Avoiding Spoiling the Mood for Sex

There is absolutely nothing worse than when a guy does something dumb to spoil the mood for sex. You know what I'm talking about...when you accidently cock-block yourself.

Why do we do it? In some cases it is a pure accident. Other times we unknowingly do something that makes the girl we are with cringe and as a guy, we just don't understand why. No matter how it happens or what it is the same result always occurs...No Sex!

Now let's just cut to the chase, getting no action sucks. You never want to get all geared up for date night and then end up with blue balls at the end of the evening. Hell you could have just sat home and watched wrestling before battling the Cyclops...if you know what I mean.

It certainly would cost less...

But let's face it...that simply isn't as fun. Having sex with a real, live woman (no offense to those guys with their blow up dolls) is much more enjoyable than going on a date with Pamela Handerson. So with that being said let's look at some of the things you need to do, or not do, to keep the mood right for a game of bury the bone.

Hygiene Issues

Remember that stinky kid from school? Remember how girls never wanted to be around him? Well make sure that you don't become that dude!

·       Avoid smelly armpits and the dreaded b.o. monster by taking a shower before you go out or at the very least freshen up your deodorant before you hook up.

·       Keep the boys smelling fresh. Women do not like it when your balls smell like ass. Step one is a shower and washing all up in there! Step two is wearing underwear that allows some movement and lets your balls breathe. Step three is using a little gold bond powder down there.

·       Avoid bad breath. Brushing teeth, flossing, and mouthwash should all be done prior to going out. Before jumping in between the sheets slip a tic tac in your mouth and use some chap stick. Seriously, those two things in your pocket can easily turn an, "Oh no," into, "Oh, oh, oh!" Chicks dig fresh breath and soft lips.

·       Keep your hands clean and fingernails trimmed and filed. We aren't saying you need a manicure, but if you have dirty hands with rough nails your fingers are never getting below her waist. Imagine if she jabbed your junk with a jagged nail...would you dig it?

·       Wear underwear like a model. That means no skid marks, no holes or ragged waistband, and by God no whitey-tighties! Just a note on skid-marks...really...are you five? Learn how to wipe your ass for Pete's sake! Your underwear says a lot about you as a man according to women. They see nasty drawers and suddenly you are gross. They see something stylish and clean then you can bet your ass they will be yanking them off.

The Rules of Gas

A badly timed belch or fart will make her vagina pucker up faster that your lips when you suck on a lemon. It has to be said; if you are feeling gassy go work it out in the bathroom before you hit the bedroom. The last thing you want to do is unleash some thunder mid-thrust, or even worse, when she is going downtown on you. She will be gun shy around your junk for a long-time after.

 The same goes for belching. If you feel one coming on then make sure you're not lip to lip because the last thing she wants to taste is the burger you ate an hour ago. Very rarely will you find a girl who thinks that it is cool and in the bedroom is not the time to find out.

There are a few ways to get around this like Gas-X and Bean-O. Those two little pills can help save a night.

The Bottom Line

It really takes a ridiculously small amount of work to make sure you don't cock-block yourself. Some minor pre-date or pre-tumble time to ensure you smell good, buying good underwear, and having a few emergency supplies on hand like chap stick, Gas-X, and a breath mint can easily make the difference between scoring a hole in one or firing the flesh musket by your lonesome.