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Are Liquid Lapdance Pants the best thing since sliced bread?

Your first question probably is, "What the heck are Liquid Lapdance pants?" Of course after I explain that to you, your next question will be, "and where can I get them?"

In a nutshell, Liquid Lapdance Pants are quite arguably the best invention by man since someone decided to affix a shiny pole to the ground and ask scantily clad women to spin around on it for our enjoyment.

Depends for Guys with Boners the term "Depends" has a bad rap because they are 'adult' diapers. Basically that is what Liquid Lapdance has created; a soft, latex pair of undergarments designed to allow you to get off while a stripper is giving you a lap dance.


Obviously we can all attest to the fact that most underwear is pretty uncomfortable when you get a boner. Boxers have that seam in the wrong spot and then you pop right out and are up against your pants. Briefs are usually too tight and even the hybrid boxer-briefs are only moderately comfy at best. This unique design utilizes a soft, latex extension to provide a man with "room to grow".

Making Lap Dances Worthwhile

If you have ever gotten a lap dance, you will know that the experience can be a bit hit or miss. A comfy pair of boxer-briefs combined with loose slacks or some good running pants can make for a decent experience. However, almost all other clothes are constrictive and basically the girl is grinding a seam or zipper into your junk...not good.

Some guys like going to clubs to watch the girls, but avoid a lapdance because of a previous painful experience.

Now the Liquid Lapdance pants not only have the pouch that allows you to get fully erect, but you can also add a squirt of lube which means no more dry humps. Let's be honest here...a dry hump was sweet in high school when you didn't know better, but once you've had sex the dry hump loses its luster and can be a bit painful.

But that same dry hump is a whole other story when you are contained in a silk pouch that glides and rubes against you as she glides and rubes against you. Even girls with less than stellar technique are going to get you there.

Last but not least, when you do get there it isn't matter of making a mess in your drawers and having a sticky walk home. No no my good bro, instead you get to blow your load inside your fully contained latex drawers which means no wet spots on your pants or on the dancer. Post orgasm, simply go to the bathroom and slip on a regular pair, toss the Liquid Lapdance Pants in the trash and be on your way.

As Good As Sex?

Honestly, no, this is not as good as sex. But you will easily get twice as much enjoyment out of a lap dance that you did before. Think of it like getting a nice handjob from a pretty girl while she shoves her tits in your face.

Of course you don't have to worry about catching a VD using the Liquid Pants nor do you have to worry about weird stains you might need to explain to a girlfriend later, or something worse like lipstick or glitter on your junk. Hell, you can even buy them so your wifey can give you a dance on those days she has a visit from Aunt Flo, sky's the limit with this incredible invention!