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Top 10 Gift Ideas To Get You Laid This Christmas

With the holidays quickly approaching, you may be freaking out over what to get that special lady (or special ladies!) in your life. Then again, since you're not a woman you probably won't even think about gift ideas until the last possible moment.


Gifts for your girlfriend or wife can be tough. You're not going to get her a last minute bargain book or a thoughtless Red Lobster gift card because you're not her uncle. Instead you may as well hand her the cash. If you are smart, however, you will get her a gift that you can both enjoy and turn White Christmas into a Red Hot Christmas Weekend. If you are looking for a gift that gives back, read on.


1. Lingerie
Lingerie makes a perfect gift because, let's face it, it's more for you than her! The real reason giving is better than receiving. With lingerie you are setting just the right mood and making your intentions perfectly clear. Feeling adventurous (and spendy)? Get her a few outfits for the holiday weekend.
Laid Factor: 5 out of 5


2. Jewelry
Perhaps it is because they're distracted by shining things or perhaps it is because all girls go through some seminar where they learn the official sex-for-jewelry exchange rate but nothing gets more guys laid than jewelry. Except maybe roofies, but go figure, those didn't make our top gift ideas...
Laid Factor: 5 out of 5, and she'll probably even do that thing you like that she only does on your birthday


3. Chocolates
All gift companies put out fancy chocolate gift boxes around the holidays making it a perfect last-minute gift you don't have to put much thought into. Besides, between football and your Xbox, you want to spend as little time thinking about things like gifts as little as possible.
Laid Factor: 3 out of 5, 5 out of 5 if she's a big girl


4. Perfume
Sometimes there is no better way to go than the tried-and-true old school gifts your grandfather has been getting your grandma for 50 years. What do you think your grandparents do all weekend after you leave? Just ask the girl behind the counter for recommendations since you don't want to accidentally buy the wrong fragrance...like Chanel No. 9: Street Walker.
Laid Factor: 3 out of 5


5. iPhone/iPad/iPod
If a more practical gift is more your thing then you can't do better than one of the ridiculously popular Apple gadgets. If she's been dying for one, you're golden. Of course, she'll want the next one that comes out in two weeks too but she'll enjoy it til the line for the next model starts forming.
Laid Factor: 4 out of 5, 5 out of 5 if you pre-load it with those sappy chick songs she likes


6. Sex Toys
The sex toy market is not just dildos and fleshlights, there are plenty of nifty little play things to add a little zest to the bed room (and kitchen table, and bathroom floor, and the hood of your neighbor's car). Nothing says happy holidays like finding a new sex swing hanging from your ceiling.
Laid Factor: 5 out of 5


7. Gadgets
If you don't want to spring for an iProduct then there are still plenty of fun gadgets to pick up your tech geek girl. This one really depends on what she's like (I know, now you wish you listened at least a little when she talks!). Think Radio Shack.
Laid Factor: Depends on your ability to remember things she's been wanting.


8. Alcohol
Back to gifts that you can both can enjoy (and don't need to spend a week's salary on). By alcohol, we certainly don't mean pick up a case of Pabst Blue Ribbon and be done with it. A nice bottle of champagne or wine (or a couple bottles) will usually loosen up any girl's inhibitions.
Laid Factor: Depends on her ability to handle booze.


9. Trip
Some people enjoy the holiday season while others would prefer nothing more than spending their December sipping Mojitos on a tropical beach. There are plenty of spots that are warm as ever right now or you could opt for the cold and hit the slopes up north.
Laid Factor: 5 out of 5


10. Date
Just take her out! This one especially works on wives or longterm girlfriends who would kill to spend a night away from the living room couch at this point. Take her to a show, a nice restaurant, or somewhere she's been wanting to go.
Laid Factor: 5 out of 5 if she follows the proper date-for-sex protocol