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At least someone knows how to shed tacklers

The final score of the Texas 5A Division II high school football championship was Spring Dekaney 34 to Cibolo Steele's 14. Spring Dekaney's head coach, Willie Amendola, was doing his post game interview at the center star of Cowboy stadium. From out of nowhere an electric cart tore across the field and took out a gaggle of reporters before picking up Coach Amendola and taking him for a brief ride.

Since that time, numerous theories have been considered to explain the incident. Suspiciously absent during the event was the head coach of Cibolo Steele. It seemed rather convenient that the cart, which may have been near the Cibolo locker room, managed to speed directly at the opposing coach while he basked in the limelight of reporters after thoroughly drubbing his opponent. When reached for comment the coach said, "Hell if I was going to use the cart I would have done it during the game as a lead blocker."

A local contingent of prepubescent nerds proposed that the cart might actually be some sort of transformer. Their idea was quickly debated and determined impossible due to various mathematical factors that I never learned because that doesn't help you get girls. One security guard mentioned the possibility of it being a paparazzi hate crime or an attempt on the local sports anchor by a rogue meteorologist.

When Jerry Jones was reached for comment he seemed more interested in the man who eventually stopped the cart. From out of the scene he jogs behind the cart before displaying a solid burst of speed and athleticism in leaping about the moving cart and then stopping it. With the weak secondary that the Cowboys have displayed this year, Jerry is obviously keeping his eyes open for talent anywhere he can find it. Depending on how the season ends for the Cowboys, Coach Jason Garrett might want to avoid news conferences at midfield just to be safe.